Saturday, January 23, 2010

My Left Nostril

Christy Brown can have his Left Foot, I have my Left Nostril! Seriously, what is up with my left nostril being tiny compared to the other one?

So today I woke up with a big fat lip that was caused by a spot on my lip. A spot. A spot turned half my mouth into half of Angelina Jolie's mouth. Who the hell would want to get collagen injections when it makes you look deformed like this?

Anyway, I took this picture to document my swollen lip and as I looked at it I thought, "holy crap, what is up with my left nostril?!" Now I feel slightly deformed and think that it may have caused a disadvantage in my life. I don't know what but I want you all to feel sorry for me and not laugh at me and my deformed nostril.

The spot appeared above my lip (it is not a cold sore) on Thursday. I believe this was a stress spot because I had just crashed my car after skidding on a sheet of ice. Why anyone wants to put a sheet of ice on the damn streets is beyond me, but this is what I slid on. And caused nearly $2,000 of damage to my car from crashing into the curb. Yes yes, I know, thank God Ned and I were not hurt, thank God we didn't hit anyone else. But seriously! $2,000? And I have to pay the first $500 for my deductible. So I guess I was sort of stressed out. And the spot appeared. And yesterday it got worse. So, I may or may not have tried to squeeze it as hard as I possibly could, and this may or may not have caused the swelling. Whatever, I am not liable for anything!

The only good thing that happened is that today I got all my hair chopped off and love it, although I am not loving the big scabby spot above my lip!

15 comments:

Shelly... said...

My friend you have a "deviated septum". Alan's nostrils used to be like that until he got it fixed (it was affecting his breathing). Also, I still think it's a cold sore. Symptoms sound just like it. However, I hope you are feeling better and your hair is SUPER cute!!!
PS move to Vegas so we can hang out more.

M said...

Really, is that what I have? So could I get the bump on my nose fixed at the same time?!

It isn't a cold sore I swear, I have had them before. This was a giant spot!

I wish we did live in the same town!

Dating said...

It isn't a cold sore I swear, I have had them before. This was a giant spot! Free Online Dating

Crazy Momma said...

Firstly, I am so glad I am not the only hysterically funny blogger who has neglected her blog.

Secondly, I am so glad you and Ned are okay.

Thirdly, you really should update with a better picture so we all see how beautiful you are without a giant spot on your face :)

Bossaye said...

I have to say that I love your blog....i have been trying to make mines look so nicebut I can't

Grease Monkey GIRL said...

Just found your blog, I laughed. Seriously funny stuff. I think it is in fact a stress pimple. I have had them before. they don't pop and they hurt like hell.

Grease Monkey GIRL said...

now I am sad because this post is from a year ago. guess you don't blog anymore? lame :(

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Keri said...

Oooooh! We have automobile crash'n'smash in common during the past few weeks. I somehow got involved in a post-grocery-shopping parking lot demolition derby a little while back.

Maybe you should start a support group for disadvantaged women with asymmetrical nostrils (DWAN?). You actually raised awareness too, because I promptly did a self-nostril examination after reading. :)

Sujay said...

So beautiful this site.I like it.Thank you.

miwokdreamer said...

as one female to another i cannot comment on your face...:) BUT as to the smile you put on mine I thank you "why anyone would put a sheet of ice on the damn streets is beyond me" just surfing the web and hitting the next blog link and thought to say hello

Molly said...

It's ok, everyone has one nostril that is bigger than another! It's a medical fact!

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